A Wise Prophet

A medieval prophet once prophesied to the king that his favorite mistress would soon die.

Sure enough, a short time later, the woman died a horrible death.

The king was outraged with the prophet, certain that his prediction had brought about the woman's demise.

Summoning the man, he demanded,"When will you die?"

The wise prophet realized that the king was planning to kill him regardless of the answer he gave, so he replied,"I only know that whenever I die, the king will die 3 days later."

I Do Not Mean For You To Fight

"Susan, Eve's Daughter," said Father Christmas. "These are for you," and he handed her a bow and a quiver full of arrows and a little ivory horn. "You must use the bow only in great need," he said, "for I do not mean for you to fight in the battle. It does not easily miss. And when you put this horn to your lips and blow it, then, wherever you are, I think help of some kind will come to you."

Last of all he said,"Lucy, Eve's Daugher," and Lucy came forward. He gave her a little bottle of what looked like glass (but people said afterwards that it was made of diamond) and a small dagger. "In this bottle," he said,"there is a cordial made of the juice of one of the fire-flowers that grow in the mountains of the sun. If you or any of your friends are hurt, a few drops of this will restore you. And the dagger is to defend yourself at great need. For you also are not to be in the battle."

"Why, sir?" said Lucy. "I think-I don't know- but I think I could be brave enough."

"That is not the point," he said. "But battles are ugly when women fight."

~C.S. Lewis, The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

*The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe is coming out in theaters this December and it excites me! So I had to post something about it.

Are you hungry? Thirsty?

The Bible cries out with one recurring truth: God quenches the thirst and satisfies the hunger of those who seek Him. So often we soothe the ache in our soul and fill the emptiness in our heart with what is only a temporary satisfaction that only God's presence can fill. Let's refuse every false satisfaction and seek the Lord!

I Want To Know, Why?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end you first try?

New Job

So, for those of you who didn't know: I finally got a job! Yeah! I've starting working at a fitness club called Health Quest for Women.

It's really nice because it's a club only for women. Plus, all the girls that work there are christians. How nice is that?

I can tan, use the sauna, and use all the equipment for free (which means that I should be getting into shape soon).

Working there seems like a pretty good thing to me so far.

Hurricane Coming

Dean and Jon sit in a bus stop shelter as the ocean waves crash around as Hurricane Rita passes by.

And the final question was?

I took a test in Microbiology last night (yes, with that teacher). I figured it would be a normal biology test. I was wrong. One of the questions on the test was: How many micrometers are in a meter? We had the typical answers like: 10, 100, 1000. The last answer was this: "What kind of stupid question is this? No one cares about math!" All the questions had answers like this thrown in..

The extra credit question was this:

You live in a square house, the windows (all four) face south. A bear walks by the window, what color is the bear?

I got it wrong...

Weird?

I was sitting on the floor today reading a book. I looked up and realized that a piece of metal was sticking out of the couch. I reached up and pulled out this.

Why would this be in our couch?

Early Morning Discussion

Aaron says to me,"I'm going to tell you a family secret."

"Ok."

"Whenever we're sick we always eat a bowl of Coco Roos."

I figured this was the end of the conversation. It wasn't.

He goes on to say,"Do you know why I like Coco Roos?"

I say,"No, tell me why."

"Because they look like dog food but taste delicious!."

Hmm...

The only thing I could think to say was,"You're weird."

He replies,"You're weird. The only reason you think I'm weird is because I have a funny voice."

Noah's Ark, A Lesson About Life

One: Don't miss the boat.

Two: Remember we are all in the same boat.

Three: Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.

Four: Stay fit. When you're 600 years old, someone may ask you to do something really big.

Five: Don't listen to critics, just get on with the job that needs to be done.

Six: Build your future on high ground.

Seven: For safety's sake, travel in pairs.

Eight: Speed isn't always an advantage. The snails were on board with the cheetahs.

Nine: When you're stressed, float awhile.

Ten: Remember, the Ark was built by amateurs; the Titanic by professionals.

Amazed

I was listening to a song by Michael W. Smith last night and in the middle of the song these words were spoken:

"The Lord reigns, let the earth be glad; let the distant shores rejoice. Clouds and thick darkness surround him; righteousness and justice are the foundation of his throne. Fire goes before him and consumes his foes on every side. His lightning lights up the world; the earth sees and trembles. The mountains melt like wax before the Lord, before the Lord of all the earth. The heavens proclaim his righteousness, and all the peoples see his glory." Psalms 97:1-6

Those verses give me the chills... It's hard to comprehend how big and powerful our God is.

Today Is Kramer Day!

If you haven't seen Seinfeld than you're missing out! I'd have to say that Kramer is my favorite of the Seinfeld cast. He's just so dang funny. And he's odd. Very, very odd.

Kramer and golf
TCB
Vandelay Industries
The Bus
and my favorite:
?

More Seinfeld to come....

Teach Part 2

Since some of you just loved my last post about my micro teacher, I decided to put another picture up there for you. I took this picture of him last night while he was showing us his latest experiment. The rod would cause noise if it was moved around the brass ring. I'm not sure what the fire did? He probably thought it looked cool. I always thought in Microbiology we would learn about cells and all that good stuff? At least he's entertaining...

Inspiration

I read this last night and it inspired me so I thought I'd blog it:

True joy only comes to those who have devoted themselves to something bigger than their own happiness and personal interests. Nehemiah said, "Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is sacred to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength." (Neh 8:10)

True joy always involves 3 things:
A conscious decision to focus each day on God's goodness.
Reaching out to bless others every chance you get.
Understanding that joy produces strength, which explains why your joy is the devil's number one target. If you lose your joy you lose your strength, and he wins!

Magic Trick

THE LEVITATION

Slowly bring your face towards the computer screen until you make the "spot" touch your nose.

Micro

To the right is a picture of my Microbiology teacher. Honest.

He's never on time, he's unorganized, and he stutters, alot. He makes me think that every class is the first one he's taught. Most of the students in the class get angry at him. I feel sorry for him.

At least this is one class that I'm actually learning something. Last night, in lab, we had to use a bunsen burner to heat some stuff up. The first thing the teach said was,"Don't burn yourself."

I have a burn mark on my right hand.

I'm slowly learning.

Facts of Life?

Here are some pointless facts I learned in class today:

According to U.S. FDA standards, 1 cup of orange juice is allowed to contain 10 fruit fly eggs, but only 2 maggots.

The song 'Strawberry Fields Forever', sung by the Beatles, refers to an orphanage located in Liverpool.

It takes 6 months to build a Rolls Royce... and 13 hours to build a Toyota.

Dentists in medieval Japan extracted teeth by pulling them out with their fingers.

The powder on chewing gum is finely-ground marble.

Tell me, why do I go to school again?

Bored? Listless? Help is at hand!

Are you bored? Does class seem pointless? Here's a list of some things you can do.

See how long you can hold your breath
(Amusement Potential: 4-20 minutes)
Not that much fun, but it sure passes the time. Play with a friend or try to beat your personal best. Some tips: hyperventilate before hand, and stay as still as possible.

Hurt yourself
(Amusement Potential:1-3 minutes)
What is pain? Why is it unpleasant? There's nothing physical about it- it's all in your mind. Plus, after pinching yourself for awhile, boredom will seem nice next to pain.

Pretend to be a car
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Make appropriate revving noises in your head as you walk along and add a racing commentary as you pass strangers in the street. Use blinking eyes as indicators for extra authenticity.

Get yourself as nauseated as possible
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Best achieved by looking straight up and spinning around. Try to be so dizzy you can't even stand up. This is also entertaining due to the "makes boredom seem a lot better" effect. (see "Hurt Yourself")


More to come next week......

Normal

I think this is one of my favorite pictures of us. We actually look pretty good, we're not making any funny faces, and we're not being attacked by animals.

I think I've done enough with the pictures for awhile.

Girls and Caribou

I'm happy to report that today is Caribou Thursday!

What happens on Caribou Thursday you ask? Well, a bunch of girls get together and try to do a bible study. Usually what happens is we sit, talk, giggle, and drink too much coffee. Not much bible studying going on.

I think that it's good for girls to get together. Even though I'm newly married there are some things that I'm sure Aaron doesn't want to hear about.

Plus, there's a lot of catching up to do since most of the girls haven't seen each other since last year.